Friday, July 27, 2012

Day 22 - The Decision Character

Making decisions is something I am not effective at yet as I usually let something 'outside of me' to make decisions for me or just wait to see what happens and then just go along with it. When I am deciding I usually consider many things, but most of them are based on mind-fucks, such as my desire to please others/everyone, fears of loosing something, fears on loosing money and what others think/say/suggest, so in this I never really investigate for myself what is the best way to act/decide and I avoid taking complete self-responsibility for my decisions as I never really make decisions based on my self-direction but let other things to have influence on me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that I am not good at making decisions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and avoid making decisions for myself and taking complete self-responsibility for my decisions by just going along with what happens.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decisions on something 'outside' of myself and letting things happen, instead of directing myself in common sense and taking self-responsibility.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear making decisions and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will make the 'wrong' decision and later regret it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not trust myself in making decisions and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish/want to rely and trust other's opinions and suggestions more than I trust myself in making decisions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that there are 'right'/'good' and 'wrong'/'bad' decisions and 'small'/'easy' and 'big'/'hard' decisions, instead of realizing that all decisions are equally just that - decisions - but with different consequences where some are proffered and others not.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that all decisions can be re-considered and re-aligned/corrected if and when I realize that their consequences are not preferred and not aligned with common sense and what is best for all and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that 'bigger' decisions are 'more serious' than 'smaller' decisions, instead of realizing that all decisions are equal within who I am when making them and within their consequential outflows.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make my decisions based on wish/want/desire to please others and make others happy and satisfied, instead of looking at practical common sense and what I would actually prefer doing here in the physical within the breath to support myself as an equal and consequently support others within developing common sense and working towards what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make decisions based on what others say/think/believe/suggest by putting more value on the opinions of others and what others say. I realize that with this I make myself inferior to others where I don't take complete self-responsibility for myself and my decisions and don't completely stand as/live my decisions and so allow myself to be swayed and manipulated by others. When and as I see myself putting more value on the opinions of others when making my decisions and basing my decisions on what others say - I stop and I breathe. Instead I investigate for myself and inform myself as best as I can and make a decision based on common sense and self-honesty where I am able to stand by it and take self-responsibility for it within considering what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decisions on how others will react and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear others reactions to my decisions and to compromise my decisions out of fear of others reactions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decision according to my feelings/emotions, instead of clearing myself to stand clear within the breath and making my decisions according to common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decisions according to money and fear of losing money, instead of common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to value/compare decisions according to how I feel about them, instead of clearing myself from emotions/feelings/reactions and looking at them in common sense and what is practically best for all.

I commit myself to within making decisions - clear myself from reactions, fears, emotions/feelings through investigating the source of these mindfucks and removing/deleting them with self-forgiveness and self-correction.

I commit myself to base my decisions on self-honesty, common sense and what is best for all and not on fear, emotions/feelings, money and others reactions or opinions.

I commit myself to trust myself within my decisions and not take others opinions/suggestions as superior and so letting others decide for me.