Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Day 131 - Making things personal VS standing as a solution
One of the big problems of human beings is that when we realize that there is a problem, a consequence that is not acceptable, we tend to get emotional (angry), start searching for someone to blame and then blame others for it and demand that others find a solution and do something about it. This approach will never solve anything!
What we must do whenever we realize that there is a consequence going on (that is not acceptable and not what is best for all Life) is, that we take self-responsibility for it by finding a solution ourselves and then standing as that solution, standing as an example and showing to others how the problem will be solved when we all align our lives to the solution, without pointing fingers and making it personal.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to wish / want / desire to blame and judge others about the points that I see are not acceptable. When and as I see myself wishing / wanting / desiring or doing this - I stop and breathe. I realize that this will only make more conflict and not solve anything. Therefore I commit myself to stop blaming and judging others, but to instead look at myself in self-honesty and correct my living according to what is best for all Life and to then instead of making things personal, rather stand as an example of how all must lives/ be a living solution. When I point out things that are not acceptable I do not blame a person but show and explain the unacceptable pattern itself and show / suggest with my example the solution that must be lived so that the point is directed in a way that is best for all Life.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the only constructive way of focusing my attention on a problem is when I look for the primary cause that led to the unacceptable consequence. I realize and understand that only by finding / diagnosing the primary cause of the problem, I will ever be able to effectively implement a practical solution, by my own example, that will support what is best for all Life. I commit myself to only focus on problems from the starting point of finding the primary cause so that I can effectively realign myself and the problem towards a solution that is best for all Life.
I commit myself to always speak about the pattern when I speak about the problem, not the person or the one who is causing the pattern as I know and understand that this will only cause reactions and conflict, where the attention is then taken away from the problem as the pattern itself and so things get personal because blame and judgment is involved.
I recommend listening to this interview about why and how do we make things personal within our minds: